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Allowing for Magic

A Collection of Poetry and Prose

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@allowingformagic

I’ve been afraid for many months now that I’m dissolving away, changing in some irreparable way. But it is a fear that I don’t have many words for, and so it has been hard to shine a light on it, hard to feel the edges of it. I don’t have much hard evidence that supports it, and so my rational brain likes to gaslight me when I feel that fear (‘You’re afraid of nothing, you’re making this up’). I have felt this way before at different stages of life, it makes sense that the pandemic is bringing it up again. But this morning, a reassuring message came through: ‘You are not becoming less like yourself, you are becoming more like yourself.’

A poem written in May—reflections on pandemic isolation, mental health, and an altered sense of self after 14 months of the pandemic 💕

Window plastic, sunshine, and hopeful-growing things.

© 2020 Amanda Balgaard. All Rights Reserved.

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